Gottman Method Couples Therapy

The Gottman Method comes out of decades of research on what makes relationships last and what wears them down. It's practical and structured, built on the idea that strong relationships aren't just about love. They're also about skill: knowing how to turn toward each other, how to repair after conflict, how to stay connected through the inevitable difficulties of a shared life.

What the Gottman Method is built on

Dr. John and Julie Gottman spent decades studying couples in their research lab, tracking what distinguished the couples who stayed together and thrived from those who didn't. What they found wasn't about compatibility or chemistry. It was about patterns: specific, identifiable behaviors that either built connection or eroded it over time.

The method they developed addresses the whole relationship. The friendship at the foundation. The way conflict gets handled. The dreams and meaning you're building together. It's one of the most evidence-based approaches to couples therapy available.

What we work on together

Depending on where you are as a couple, the work might focus on rebuilding fondness and admiration that's been worn down. On learning to recognize and interrupt the Four Horsemen (criticism, contempt, defensiveness, stonewalling) before they do more damage. On understanding the difference between solvable problems and perpetual ones, and how to navigate both.

It's structured, but it doesn't feel clinical. It feels like finally having a framework for the things you've been struggling to talk about.

Who this is for

Couples who want a concrete, skills-based approach alongside the emotional work. Couples who like understanding the research behind what they're doing. Couples who have tried other approaches and want something more structured. Couples at any stage, from newly together to long-married, who want to invest in their foundation.

I'm trained in the Gottman Method and use it alongside EFT and a psychodynamic lens, drawing on whatever combination best fits where you are.

I work with couples in Issaquah, Sammamish, North Bend, Snoqualmie, and across the Eastside. Telehealth is available throughout Washington. The free 15-minute call is the place to start.